{"id":319,"date":"2021-02-19T22:14:00","date_gmt":"2021-02-19T21:14:00","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/the-wiseguy.com\/Readzzz\/?p=319"},"modified":"2021-02-08T22:18:29","modified_gmt":"2021-02-08T21:18:29","slug":"i-never-got-to-eat-my-chips","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/the-wiseguy.com\/Readzzz\/i-never-got-to-eat-my-chips\/","title":{"rendered":"I never got to eat my chips"},"content":{"rendered":"\n

This was in fourth grade, and I was in this class with all these dumbass kids.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Here\u2019s the back story: My parents usually pack me fruit for a snack, but on this day they packed me like half of the leftover Pringles from the day before, you know, in that cylinder container. I was really excited since I LOVE PRINGLES. But when recess came around so I could take MY Pringles and go eat it outside, they weren\u2019t in my bag. I started scoping the area, trying to find my Pringles. I call the teacher, she tries to find them but she can\u2019t either. Than this thought comes to my mind\u2014What if MOIRA STOLE IT?<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Moira was this chubby girl in my class that literally ALWAYS wore this purple princess dress that should be classified as a bad Halloween costume (seriously) and was known for being a bitch.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Being the judgmental 9-10 year old I was, I straight out concluded that she must\u2019ve stolen my damn Pringles. I just tell my teacher, \u201cWell too bad, I\u2019ll just go out for recess now. It was just PRINGLES.\u201d Being a little angel. So I stomp out of the class and start searching for Moira. I\u2019m talking checking areas, finding witnesses, wasting my time. So after a solid 10 minutes, I find a group of these kids crowded at the side of one of the portable classrooms. I rush over to see what it is. The kids were eating Pringles. Barbecue flavored Pringles. MY PRINGLES. I start raging as I smack the Pringles out of the kids\u2019 hands and start ripping people away from the main source. And in the middle of all the kids, sat a smug looking MOIRA with my PRINGLES. I look all mad and rip the BLOODY EMPTY CONTAINER OF PRINGLES OUT OF THE DAMN BITCH\u2019S FILTHY HANDS. By now even dumbass Moira knows what\u2019s up, she\u2019s a goner. I would\u2019ve murdered her at the very least, but a supervisor saw us and ran over.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Moira was forced to apologize and I was forced to accept her damn apology.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

I never got to eat my Pringles.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\"\"<\/a><\/figure><\/div>\n\n\n\n

<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

This was in fourth grade, and I was in this class with all these dumbass kids. Here\u2019s the back story: My parents usually pack me fruit for a snack, but on this day they packed me like half of the leftover Pringles from the day before, you know, in that cylinder container. I was really […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":320,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[38],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-319","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-funny"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/the-wiseguy.com\/Readzzz\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/319","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/the-wiseguy.com\/Readzzz\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/the-wiseguy.com\/Readzzz\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/the-wiseguy.com\/Readzzz\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/the-wiseguy.com\/Readzzz\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=319"}],"version-history":[{"count":1,"href":"https:\/\/the-wiseguy.com\/Readzzz\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/319\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":322,"href":"https:\/\/the-wiseguy.com\/Readzzz\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/319\/revisions\/322"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/the-wiseguy.com\/Readzzz\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/320"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/the-wiseguy.com\/Readzzz\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=319"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/the-wiseguy.com\/Readzzz\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=319"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/the-wiseguy.com\/Readzzz\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=319"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}